[iniyaitza]

Recent passing of my terminally ill Mother has left the technicolor world in which I lived, black-and-white. Has anyone had any good experience with grief counseling in the United States? Any other recommendations for coping?

[maryjane_181]

I'm really sorry for your loss. What could it hurt to try the counseling? If it helps you then at least you can get some help dealing with this and if it doesn't help then at least you have made an effort. I used to babysit a woman's children every week while she went to grief counseling but it was a group meeting and it really did help her. I would suggest a group counseling so that you can have support from others that actually do understand what you are going through.

[Lucinda B]

I think if you are asking about grief counseling, it's time to seriously look for one. Try your local church first. They may have some suggestions. If you are religious, talking to a priest or being referred by your priest/minister to someone in your same situation could help. Yahoo Groups I'm sure has some support groups out there. Try Yahoo's yellow pages. I'm sure there is a listing or two there. Your local YMCA or YWCA may be a good place to ask as well. They may have some good referrals. If your world has changed, it's time to seek someonne to talk to about your feelings, someone outside a family member that cann help you work through your feelings. Grieving is a process and each person goes through the process differently. I know it helped my mother a lot when she lost her husband.I'm sorry for your loss. God Bless.

[micki_g]

It's good that you recognize that you may need help with this. If she suffered long than you could also be going through something like post traumatic stress disorder, or even survivors guilt (can present itself in many forms). A grief counselor is like a teacher or personal coach. They can help you retrain your self to cope with day to day life, and get into a new routine.Also take out an old project that you and her worked on or take a trip you two wanted to do together, but never could get around to doing. Either by your self or with a mutual friend or close family member. This will help you get some closure...And yes you need that.

One thing you should understrand that death is a certainty as such one should accept it gracefully and should not grief.Life will be more peacefull if you sit down and think all the good things she had done for you and all the good qualities she possessed and you should try and emulate her.

I am sorry for your loss. Many places offer bereavement counseling. Try your church or you could contact any Hospice organizaton and they would have a list of counselors in your area. Do believe I'll never leave you, Always I'll be in your heart. Don't forget my soul is near you, And so we'll never be apart. Best of Luch.

In my opinion the best way to deal with grief is a change of perspective given to me by African people.They don't grieve someones death but celebrate their lost ones life.Allowing them to talk to smile over fond memories.The biggest mistake we western people make is to stop talking to suppress feelings there for reliving the pain of the loss.Talking allows you to remember the good things that you can't loose.Talk to people who know your mother in a different way.And know death isn't the end, it's the beginning.edit 31-05-2023 : Seek grief counseling if you feel you need it but most of all talk, there are so many loving souls willing to listen in several chats.People who lost someone will empathize with you in posts like these or chat rooms.I've been to more funerals of loved ones than marriage parties.And time is a good healer if you work with it.People who tell you"you'll get over it"are ignorant but like everyone else you learn to live with the scars.Just take your time, every death every grief it's different for everyone of us.We all cope differently and nothing is abnormal.There is also no set time table in which you have to be done grieving.Some people do it in 3 years others take 7 and there's nothing wrong with that either.